


V3 Cast as teachers/Saihara needs some help

by turtlebish



Series: My weird fanfics (pretty much parody/crack fics) [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Teachers, Crack, Crack and Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Crack, KOREKIYO THE PRINCIPAL, LOGICAL THINKING IN CRACK FIC- (according to one person on amino bless u). in like chapter 6 tho, Parody, actually the whole school bullies shuichi. literally his own class, also, also kokch is gay for him for like 10 years but he will never admit it, also x2, amami is emo who bullies shuichi, and i wouldnt call them good, and turns into angst, crack that apperantly GETS PLOT, he gets crazy later ack, im still uploading it, kiibo is precious, oh ya and shits r starting in chapter 4, ok so, some police officers appears later, umm ya basically they r teachers, usually kokichi appears to help him there tho, yes shuichi is very hurted in this fic. im serious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-06-27 22:40:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15694794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/turtlebish/pseuds/turtlebish
Summary: OkBasically, an au (and parody) where v3 cast are teachers, and most of them are bad at this, but some of them are doing this on purpose, for example kokichi abusing his students. Everything is (pathological, why they still have that job pls someone fire them i actually feel sorry for those students) perfectly fine, till in chapter 4 shuichi is done with ppl bullying him, and shits starts to go down





	1. Kokichi as teacher

**Author's Note:**

> ok so the first one features kokch and his abusing towards sluts, so called students  
> also if u saw this already on amino  
> dont worry  
> im not stealing  
> its a me, (mARIO) the author

"oKAY LISTEN UP SLUTS"

 

"WE'RE NOT SLUTS"

 

"SHUT UP TEDDIE, I KNOW WHAT UR MOTHER WAS DOING WITH THAT MAILMAN"

 

Kokichi shout while he came to the classroom.

 

"How the hell HE is our teacher??"

 

"I heard that he blackmailed someone..."

Too bad for the girls who was gossiping him.

 

"I heard u two talking. SAMANTHA, DO I NEED TO REMIND U WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PREVIOUS ONES?"

"NO U DONT, U TOLD US THIS STORY ALREADY. U SOLD ONE OF STUDENTS TO YASUHIRO WHO SACRIFASED BOY TO HIS GODS"

 

"Actually... " one student started "i think he only told him to help him with stea- i mean working."

"Shut up kevin, no one cares." Kokichi replies

"MY MOTHER DOES!"

 

"Yes, you're right kevin. Your mother truly loves you, and also i wanted apologise to you for my unneacceptable behavior as a teacher, and my attitude towards you all... " kokichi walks around "or not. "

 

Kevin murmurs something about calling the police and emphasies on "dancing on the vulkano" part, as kokichi walks towards the blackboard, and started writing.

 

"OKAy assholes. Because im in good mood, we'll be having some easy subject"

 

And so, on the blackboard appeared: **"10 reasons why saihara chan is hot"**

 

"And make sure you will remember this because its gonna b on test."

 

"..."

 

"Im talking to u nagisa, u still havent passed a single test."

"eXCUSE ME" nagisa shout " ITS noT MINE FAULT I DONT KNOW WHAT IS THE COLOR OF MR. SAIHARA BOXERS"

"AND ANOTHER F FOR SHOUTING AT TEACHER. Really nagisa, you're anger issues are getting worse and worse. Your parents should give you more medicines."

"IM ALMOST GETTING HEART ATTACKS BECAUSE OF THOSE DAMN PILLS!????!? "

"OKAY, ILL MAKE SURE TO CONTACT UR PARENTS AND SAY U NEED MORE"

"BDJSJSJSJ"

 

Nagisa falls on the floor and stops moving.

"Um guys, i think he's having this heart attack" one girl says

"Leave him be" kokichi spats.

"bUT-"

"LEAVE HIM BY"

 

" _*cough*_ before i die... " nagisa gasps "monaca... I want u to know..."

"Monaca, tell him he suck " kokichi says

"U suck! "

"Thats mah girl. 10 points to slytherin!"

"EEEEEEEEK" Nagisa screams and rolls on the floor back and fourth, and kokichi claps to get class' attention.

 

"Okay i think i bullied nagisa enough. Whos next? Hmmm, lets see, who didnt finish their homework... Kotoko lil bug, go to the fking blackboard to cry over ur life!"

"FUCK"

"Dont worry kotoko, im sure they'll arrest him soon " Masaru says.

"Ya u wish u dipshitz. KOTOKO TO THE BLACKBOARD NOW"

"IM GOING, FUCK" Kotoko says as she stood up and starts walking "JUST TO BE CLEAR, ILL MAKE SURE TO SEE YOU IN COURT FOR STEALING MY MONEY

 

"What money?"

"DONT PLAY DUMB, U SAID THIS IS A PRIVATE SCHOOL, AND THAT I HAD TO PAY YOU IN ADVANCE FOR NEXT THREE YEARS"

"Oh yea, old good tricking first class students " kokichi comments

 

"HEY! " masaru stands up and shouts" IS THIS A CONFESSION TO WHAT U DID!?"

"it WOULD BE, IF IT WASNT FOR MY AMNESIA"

"tHE HE- "

"THREE CIRCLES AROUND SCHOOL NOW OR ILL SEE U IN COURT"

"WHY WOULD YOU SEE ME IN COURT!?? I DID NOTHING!"

"You literally ignored your classmate having heart attack. Not performing first aid is illegal yanno"

Nagisa cries on the floor.

"Ur dad wouldnt be happy about this"

Masaru sits on the chair shaking.

 

"Okay now, kotoko... " kokichi looks at her, who shrieks.

"I'LL DO IT WHATEVER ILL BE QUEIET!!"

"GOOD! Because im gonna give u a task. Make poem about me and shuichi."

"WhAT THIS- wait this is actually pretty easy, huh. Okay, so... " pink haired girl clears her throat. " One time, he looked at me, with his golden eyes, and once he done that i realised... Im gay for him."

**kOKICHI GASPS "NO IM NOT"**

**"OMG R U ACTUALLY PLAYING CLOSET CASE!??"**

**"-100 TO RAVENCLOW, ALSO U FAIL THIS GRADE"**

**"WHAT THAT WAS JUST A MISTAKE, U CANT DO THIS!!!"**

**"MONACA, BRING DADDY A CHAINSAW."**

 

 **"Aye Aye father"** monaca shouts happily and runs out of the classroom.

 

**"oH MY GOD IM SORRY ALSO U CANT JUST KILL ME"**

**"ARE U TELLING ME WHAT TO DO U LIL GIRL?"**

**"NO IM SORRY MISTER"**

**"THEN GO BACK TO YOUR CHAIR"**

 

Kotoko runs to her desk and sobs.

 

**"THATS NOT FAIR, U CANT TREAT US LIKE THIS" One girl stood up proundly.**

 

Kokichi stares at her.

 

"Okay nevermind" sits again terrifed

 

...

...

 

"Wait, but if kotoko is not gonna get killed... " the boy called baleron says " then monaca doesnt need to bring that chainsaw, right?"

 

"Baleron u trAITOR, DONT TALK SO CASUALLY TO HIM" Kotoko whispers

 

"Oh about that" kokichi says "well ur right but i already sended her aaand some chainsaw would be nice decoration on christmas. I never liked mistletoe anyway"

 

"..."

 

"But instead of kissing we're gonna preform murder :33"

 

"..."

 

"Thats not funny when yall doesnt react"

 

"..."

 

" k ill ignore u too"

 

"..."

 

And so, the entire hour was filled with silence.

Till baleron broke it. Literally.

 

"Ow my hands"

"Intriguing"

"Ye"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well  
> rip baleron's hands  
> also nothing's better than good old abusing students, eh?


	2. Shuichi as a teacher

**Shuichi:** hello class pls dont hurt me

 **Students:** LETS BULLY HIM

 **SHUICHI:** NO

 

**Suddenly, the doors got kicked out by kokichi and monaca with chainsaw.**

 

 **KOKICHI:** FUKKKIIIIIING NOOORMIEEEEEEEEEES

 **Shuichi:** AAK, KOKICHI SENSEI SAMA SENPAI, YOU'VE CAME TO SAVE ME!??

 **KOKICHI:** B-B-B-B-BAKA I WOULD NEVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS I-I-I-ITS NOT L-LIKE I L-LOVE YOU FOR 10 Y-YEARS ANYTHING

 **Shuichi:** You're right Mr. Ouma, I am sorry for misunderstanding your intentions.

 **Kokichi:** I accept the apologies Mr. Saihara. Please, do not let this down you.

 **Class:** the fuck are we watching

 **KOKCH:** NORMIEEEEEEEEEEEES

 

**Kokichi points at students, and monaca with her chainsaw runs towards them.**

 

 **sTUDENT 1:** OH MY GOD WE'RE FUCKED

 **mONACA:** MY CHAINSAW CAN FUCC U IF U KNOW WHAT I MEAN

 

**Kaito, teacher of informatics came to classroom with beer in one hand.**

 

 **Kaito:** whazzzzzzzzup, sluuuts _*hic*_ stilllll caant... Do a lesson.. Without ko- _*hIC*_ -KCH?

 **Shuichi:** oh my god kaito go to class ur drunk

 **Kokichi:** wait shouldnt be the opposite-

 **Kaito:** AYyy AYyy fKing caaptain _*hic*_

 

**Kaito said, and turned around to exit the class.**

 

 **Kokichi:** what a sad man. Probably even more sad than me. Didnt know it was even possible.

 

 **kokichi:** ...

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **Shuichi:** thats sweet daughter u have there

 **kokichi:** wh monaca is not mine- I MEAN OFC, WHAT DID U THINK, I LOVE KIDS- do u like kids too saihara chan?

 **shuichi:** what.

kokICHI: I MEAN DO U LIKE MY BO- OH GOD NVM

 **shuichi:** what.

 

 **monaca:** daddy help im scared of the dots, and the shuichi's ones r killing me

 **kokichi:** gosh darnit shuichi stop it ur killing my kid

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **KOKICHI:** FKJDSJFSKDFJSKDLJFSKLDFJSKDF

 **monaca:** its too late daddy, i need to say goodbye to this world

 **students:** what the actual fu-

 **MONACA:** OR, I CAN EVOLVE LOL

 **student:** im scared

 **monaca:** u will b when my chainsaw will say hi to ur butt

 

 

**•Whenever kokichi isnt around, Shuichi usually hides under the desk thru classes.**

**•day without class bullying him is a blessing**

**•kokichi is gay for him like 10 years but he will never admit it.**

**•Kaito is a sad man because he's dreams are shattered.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY, THIS IS THE SHORT ONE


	3. Miu, Gonta, Kaito, Angie and Kokichi as teachers (short scenes)

_**Miu, PE teacher:** _

 

 **Miu:** OPEN UR TEXTBOOKS SLUTS

 **Class:** WE DONT USE TEXT BOOKS HERE

 **Miu:** Oh shiet u right _*miu thinks for a moment*_ OPEN UR DICKS SLUTS

 **Class:** THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS-

 

 **Police:** hello we've been informed about sexual assault towards students by u mrs iruma

 **Miu, to police:** open yo dick pussies

 **Police:** oh no its retarded _*goes away*_

 

 **Student 1:** wait what the fu

 **Police officers 1:** wAIT WE SHOULDNT B LEAVING

 **STUDENT 2:** YES

 

**kokch suddenly appears with monaca**

**KOKCH:** GO BITE OFFICERS AS UR DADDY THAUGHT U

 **MONACA:** AYE AYE FATHER

 **MIU:** BITE THEIR DI-

 **KOKCH:** NO

**Miu:**

**Miu:** can i bite them tho

 **pOLice:** WHAT

 

**•No one knows why miu is still teacher**

**•Gets along with kokch for some reason aka revealed later**

 

_**Kokichi, the ??? Teacher:** _

"OW FUCK MY PEN JUST BROKE"

"Sir, that is chair"

"What."

"You've been writing with a chair instead of a pen."

"What."

"And when class said 'U CANT WRITE WITH CHAIR' you didnt listen."

"What." Kokichi looks at the broken chair in his hand. "I mean thats pretty impressive, i lifted big ass chair with one hand"

 

"..."

"... THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN U STEAL MAH GLASSES"

 

"Sir, you do not have glasses"

"Oh shi your right. Wait then why did i took chair instead of a pen?"

"THATS OUR LINE-"

 

**•no one knows what exactly he teaches**

**•abuses his students**

**•gay for saihara and shows it in every possible way but he will never admit it**

**•Hated miu and vice versa, till they both discovered they have the same passion- terrorizing their students**

 

 

_**Gonta, the biology teacher:** _

_Silence._

_Silence._

_Silence._

_Silence._

_Perfect si-_

**Student:** _*cough*_

 **gONTA:** _*GOES SSJ BLUE*_ DID SOMEONE SAID THEY HATE BUGS!?????

 **Student:** nO I DIDNT IM SORRY ILL B QUIET

_Silence._

_Silence._

_Perfect sile-_

**GONTA:** U KNOW WHAT, I THINK SOMEONE DID SAY SHIT ABOUT BUGZ. PREPARE TO DIE

 **MIU:** _*KICKS OUT THE DOOR*_ NOT IN MAH CLASS

 **Student:** This isn't your class.

 **Miu:** Oh my, I apologise then. _*fixes the door and leaves*_

 **STUDENT:** WAIT DONT GO THO

 

**•Gonta has angry issues.**

**•Way to sensitive about bugs**

**•Whenever he goes ssj blue Miu usually stops him.**

**• ssj blu, the obvious reference from dragon ball super**

 

_**Kaito, informatics teacher:** _

**Kaito opens class with already filled class**

**Kaito:** hELLO, kIDZ _*hIc*_

 **Students:** oh god he's drunk again

 **Kaito:** let ussssas tAlk about ... Mm hmmmrjmrmmm.... _*falling asleep, but wokes*_ SPACE _*HIc*_

**Class:**

**Class:** okay.

 **Kaito:** sO WHEN I WAS IN UR AGE... i wANTeD to bE... _*almost crying*_ i wANTED TO BE AN AUSTRONAUT _*crying*_

 

**•Kaito, unable to fulfill his dreams about space becomes drunk sad man.**

**• his class likes, and feels bad for him, so everytime Kaito wants to talk about space, class agrees and simply let him talk.**

 

 

_**Angie, the art teacher:** _

**Angie:** Hello class, let's talk about atua!

 **Class:** this isnt religon class

 **ANGIE:** ATUA WILL FUCC U FOR UR BLASPHEMY

 **clASS:** OH GOD YES

 **Angie:** oh no, the sinners _*leaves*_

 **Class:**...

 **Class:** *silent cheering*

…

**On the outside, angie sees random ppl.**

 

 **Angie:** praise god pls

 **others:** no

 **Angie:** WELL SCREW U TOO

 

**Few moments later**

 

 **Principal, looking from the window:** oh my god, is that angie again running after random people

 **Kokch:** yup

 **Principal:** go stop her

 **Kokch:** what no ew

 **Principal:** kokch she have a chainsaw

 **Kokch:** so

 **Principal:** she screams about how this chainsaw will fucc their asses

 **Kokch:** wait isnt this monaca's line-

 **PRINCIPAL:** THATS NOT THE ISSUE

 

**•"Go praise atua or die" angie's motto**

**•She's actually smart**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well  
> so  
> OH WAIT I KNOW WHAT TO SAY- tbh i wanted to put more miu and kokichi's relationship as friends, but i kinda didnt make it when i was originally writing this fic, and now there's not rly time for that


	4. In principal's office.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> finally shits r starting  
> also the huge reveal of the principal

Morning, most of v3 cast is gathered in the principal's office.

 

 **Principal:** okay my dear sweet teachers

 **Miu:** u will not touch my butt

 **Principal:** AS I WAS SAYING, MY DEAR TEACHERS

 **kokch:** u will not touch saihara's butt

 **SHUICHI:** OUMA SENPAI

 **PRINCIPAL:** AS I WAS TRYING TO SAY

 **Kaito:** _*hIc*_ shut up kork no one wants to listen

 **Kork the principal:** FUCK, THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE PLOT TWIST U IGNORANT SLUT

 

 **Kokch:** hey, remember when yall asked why me and miu didnt got fired because we call students "sluts"? Heres yo anwser

 **Kork:** OKAY SHUT UP, I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING IM-

Silence.

 **Miu:** the fucc

 **Kork:** to be honest, i thought someone will interrupt me for sure, so-

 

...

 

 **Kork:** nvm _*COUGHS*_ sO

 **Shuichi:** did he just coughed in his mask??

 **Kokch:** yup

 **KORK:** AS I WAS SAYING, THE TEACHERS OF THIS SCHOOL, I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT CULTURE FESTIVAL

 **GONTA:** DID SOMEONE SAID SHIT ABOIT BUGS *GOES SSJ BLU*

 **Kork:** oh my god not again

 **GONTA:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **Kork:** ok tell me now who the fucc invited gonta here

 **ANGIE:** ME. THATS FOR NOT PRAYING TO ATUA WITH ME THIS MORNING U SATAN SLU-

 **Kork:** no

 **Angie:** satan bitch

 **Kork:** better

 **Amami:** im scared

 **Kokch:** good

 **AMAMI** : OH SO THATS HOW IT IS HUH

 **Kork:** oh god no amami chill

 

 **AMAMI:** YALL TALK ABOUT SHITS AND STUFF, BUT NEVER ABOUT ME NO ONE CARES WHAT I THINK OR FEEL

 **ANGIE:** BECAUSE U KEEP SAYING HOW COOL IS TO B THE MYSTERY, FUCC

 **AMAMI:** U IGNORANT BITCHES NONE OF U UNDERSTAND THIS DEEP AGONY IM DROWNING IN, IM LEAVING

 

**Amami cries, successfully ruining his make up, and then prepares to leave the room. However, he stops when he sees saihara near to the door.**

 

 **Shuichi:** hello, please dont hurt me

 

**Amami punches him**

 

 **SHUICHI:** WHY GOD

 

 **Kokichi kicks amami's head, successfully out of the room too**.

<><><>

_**(Quick facts about amami:** _

**•geography teacher**

**•emo**

**•complicated nature)**

<><><>

 

 **Kork** : okay that was awk-

 **GONTA:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **Kork:** oh god he's still going

 **MIU:** YO GONTA, THERES CAT CHASING LADYBUGS ON THE OUTSIDE

 **GONTA:** NOOOOOOOOOO, MY LADIES

 

**Gonta jumps out of the window. After landing on ground, he turns back to group.**

 

 **GONTA:** BUT I SWEAR, IF U TALK SHITZ ABOUT BUGS WHILE IM NOT THERE, YALL DEAD

 

**And then, he runs after... Something. While korekiyo is sobbing**

 

 **Kork:** _*sniff*_ that was... The third window... _*sob*_

 **Kaito:** oOOOHHH KOREKIYO, U FINALLY _*HIC*_ MATCH MAH SOUL

 

 **Kokch:** okay but how about we'll stop giving him mental breakdown and hear what he have to say?

 **KORK:** YES

 **SHUICHI:** NO

 **KORK:** _*STARES*_

 **SHUICHI:** I MEAN YES

 

 **Kork:** okay, so in this year, i thought about inviting circus to this school

 **Angie:** oh hey thats nice

 **KOKICHI:** AND WE'LL MAKE OUT OF STUDENTS THE ACROBATS AND WATCH THEM TRYING TO AMUSE US

 **SHUICHI:** NO

 **MIU:** YES

 **SHUICHI:** _*STARES*_

 **MIU:** STILL YES

 **SHUICHI:** FUCC

 

 **Kork:** oh right, there was something i needed to talk about with you mr. Saihara

 **Shuichi:** pls dont hurt me- oh its u kiyo

 **Kork:** oh i forgot _*slaps saihara*_

 **Shuichi:** gOD, WHY ME

 

**Kork blocks kokichi who was just trying to attack him.**

 

 **KOKCH:** FUCK ILL GET TO UR CAR

 **KORK:** TRY IT BITCH. anyway mr saihara as i was saying-

 **Shuichi:** _*shakes, but then kokichi takes him to his arms*_

 **KOKCH:** _*at kork*_ HISSSSSSSSSSSS

 **Kork:** i just wanted to talk about ur uncle's business

 **SHUICHI:** WHY WOULD I WANT TO TALK TO PERSON WHO JUST SLAPPED MEH

 **KOKichi:** shh shh, mah lil bab, ur safe with me uwu _*pets him, still holding*_

 **Angie:** awe

 **Miu:** oh no my heart cold af gets som feels

 

**Kork goes to his desk, and once again, crying.**

 

 **Kork:** why cant i have one normal conversation...?

 **SHUICHI:** U CANT EXPECT NORMAL CONVERSATION AFTER SLAPPING PPL

 **KORK:** U DESERVED THIS

 **SHUICHI:** WELL AND U SURE DESERVE THIS _*TAKES GUN AND AIMS AT KOREKIYO*_

 **KOKCH:** _*JUMPS FROM SAIHARA*_ WAI WHA

 **KORK:** EEK

 **MIU:** ACK

 **Angie:** meh. Saw worse things happening in atua's church

 **Kokch:** holy shit rly

 

**Suddenly, ryoma appears**

 

 **RYOMA:** I APPEARED

...

 **Ryoma:** I...

...

 **Ryoma:** appeared...

...

 **Ryoma:** Here... Right now...

...

 **Ryoma:** nvm

<><><>

**(•second biology teacher**

**•socially awkward**

**• love kittens, usually his classes r filled with chats about cats**

**•suprisingly, he's liked by class)**

<><><>

 

 **Ryoma:** ...

...

 **Ryoma:** wanna talk about cats

 **Miu:** no

 **KaiTO:** y E* HIC* S

 **Kork:** no

 **Kokch:** y e s

 **Angie:** n O

 **Succi:** y E S

 **Gonta, coming back running:** n O

 **Ryoma:** goddamit, there isnt any more ppl here-

 **Amami, coming back too:** Y eS

 **RYOMA:** AYYYYYY MAH DUDE

 **AMAMI:** _*points finger guns at him*_

 

 **Kork:** can we at least talk about culture festival for a moment

 **Kokch:** leave it to those dirty bastards

 **Kork:** u mean our students

 **Kokch:** yup

 **Kork:** wait a second i just remembered- SUCCI, UR GUN-

 

 **Shuichi:** What gun _*holds no gun*_

 **Kork:** the one... That u had...

 **KAitO:** mYYYY MAAN. DI id N T. hAVE anyyyy.... WeapaaH _*hIc*_

 **Kork:** The.. The gun... That u were aiming at me with...

 **Miu:** T-THIS SLUT DIDNT HAVE ANY WEAPON

 **SHUICHI:** NICER. _*POINTS WITH GUN AT MIU*_

 **MIU:** I MEAN, MR SAIHARA D-DOES NOT HAVE ANY WEAPONS

 **shuichi:** good

**Kork:**

**Kokch:**

**Kork:** stop pretending, i know ur crying inside

 **Kokch, crying:** now on the outside ;--------; Shuichi pls drop this gun

 **Shuichi:** no

 **Kokch:** _*cries harder*_

<><><>

_**Update on shuichi:** _

**•Now whenever someone tries to bully him he threatens them with gun**

**•kork, as an apologies for slapping him, lets him carry the gun, but he can SHOW it only in self defence**

**•Kork:** TRY TO ACTUALLY SHOOT ANYONE WITH THIS AND YOU'RE FIRED

 **KOKCH, STILL CRYING:** PLS JUST DO AS HE SAYS

**•Ouma is emotionally broken bc saihara became creepy dude with gun. Still wont leave him tho**

**•the person he will not threaten with gun no matter what is ouma (prob bc he was the only defending him multiple times)**

 

_**FINALLY, KOREKIYO THE PRINCIPAL:** _

**•No one knows why is he the principal and how he got this job**

**•no one knows what happened to previous principal either**

**•never takes off his mask, even when speaking thru the mic. Because of that, none of students nor teachers can understand him whenever he uses that damn mic**

**• kork:** i would rather not take my mask off and make my students think i might b trans

 **Kokch, spitting out the tea:** UR NOT TRANS-

 

_**Bonus:** _

 

A few days later.

Saihara's class.

 **Someone:** _*cOUGH*_

 **SHUICHI:** U SAID WHAT ABOUT ME _*POINTS WITH GUN AT STUDENTS, WHO STARTED SCREAMING*_

Suddenly, Kokichi appears in the door, with monaca. Not saying a word and not looking in shuichi's eyes, he takes his gun and replaces it with something else

"Is this watergun??"

"Yup" kokichi replies, and turns to monaca "stay here, watch the class, you know what to do"

"Ay ay, father"

Monaca replies, and Kokichi silently leaves the classroom, with green haired girl standing next to shuichi.

After a few seconds, when Monaca makes sure Kokichi can't hear them anymore, she turns around to Shuichi

"He's gay for u"

"I know."

<><><>

 

_**Updates on kokichi:** _

**•whenever shuichi tries to threaten others with gun, kokichi always takes his gun and replaces with something else. Once it was a chair.**

**•its not the first time kokch leaves monaca with him. He started to do this after 2 days with gun thing in kork's office.**

**Also**

**•shuichi knows**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was kinda wheezing bc the last scene was supposed to be more serious, but it didn't really fit the fic's format, ack  
> oh welp, rip kokichi  
> ...  
> ...  
> *OUMASAI FANGIRLING INTENSFIES*


	5. Shuichi in classroom with Monaca, till Gonta walks in.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The situation has been doing terrible, since Shuichi now owns his gun, with unfortunate, Principal Kork premission, as a form of a apology for slapping him earlier. And even when Kokichi tried to control situation, it haven't exactly worked, and things in his class starts to look a bit bad...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tip #43: stuff with dots at the end of chapters r more or less important to au/plot or if u like details, since i don't always manage to put all informations in the fic

**Last time, after a years of abuse by his own students and som teachers, shuichi breaks and decided to threaten everyone who bullies him with a gun, which kork the principal let him keep, as the apologies for kork slapping shuichi.**

**Its been a few days, however, kokichi made a new routine; whenever shuichi starts threaten his students, he comes to his class to take his gun and replace it with random objects, and then leaves monaca with him to watch the classroom. and so, a few days passed... Also Amami got kicked by school for bullying saihara.)**

 

 

 **Shuichi, in classroom:**  Oh my sweet gun, ur the only one who trully understands me

 **"kokch:** _exCUSE MEH"_

 **Shuichi:**  Was that kokichi's voice??

 **Monaca, holding a phone** : Yup - he told me to play this whenever, i quote "my dumb love will say some shit"

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **Monaca:**  Also he's very sorry about ur boxe-

 **SHUICHI:** NVM, I DONT WANNA HEAR THAT

 

 **STUDENTS:** WELL, NEITHER WE DO???

 **Shuichi:** oh shut up, im busy talking to someone

 **Kotoko:** oh my god, that was supposed yo be damn lesson

 **Shuichi:**  Lel ye, and my life was supposed to turn out good, YET HERE WE ARE

 **Samantha, one of the students:**  Oh my god, what did we expect tho. almost none of our teachers actually does proper lessons

 

 **Baleron guy:** wai WHA- THEN HOW THE HELL THIS SCHOOL THIS FUNCTIONS

 **Samantha:** oh right ur new. so u see, apperantly when we tell something our parents they go to school, and then teachers does sexy poses

 **Baleron:** sWEET JESUS WTH

 **Baleron:** YO CAN WE SEE THAT THO- MR SAIHARA STRIP

 **Shuichi:** _*points with gun at baleron*_ FUCC U, U STRIP

 **BALERON:** ALRIGHT FUCCERS PREPARE FOR MY SWEET ASS

 **SHUICHI:** OH GOD DONT NVM

 **BALERON:** BITCH

 **Monaca:** STRIP U DAMN SLUT *TAKES out the camera*

 **Shuichi:** WHATS WITH THIS CAMERA

 

 **Monaca:** well while he will be stripping, im gonna obv record it, after that ill edit his hair to blu, sell video to kokichi saying this is u

 **BALERON:** OH GOD YES

 **SHUICHI:** WHY THE HELL UR HAPPY ABOUT THIS

 **SHUICHI:** ALSO HELL NAW _*takes monaca's camera*_

 **mONACA:** OH U FKING PIECE OF SHIT

 **Shuichi:** _*points at monaca with his gun*_ WORDS.

 **Monaca:** bITCH i know u cant shoot anyone with it

 **Nagisa:** wAIT HE CANT

 **Shuichi:** _*shoots ceilling*_ betch just bc kork said that doesnt mean ill follow it

 **Nagisa:** fucc.

 

 **Kotoko:** wait, didnt mr ouma took his gun, like few minutes ago???

 **Shuichi:** as if u didnt notice, every time he takes it, i just get new

 **KOTOKO:** HOW

 **SHUICHI** : SCREACH _*shoots the bird outside*_

 **kotoko, shaking:** oh my god someone needs to sto-

 **GONTA:** DID SOMEONE SAY SHIT ABOYT BUGZ

 

 **Shuichi:** wait how did he come here

 

**Gonta came to classroom.**

 

 **Shuichi:** better. no wait wth, what U r doing here???

 **GONTA:** YOUUUUUUUU _*slowly goes super saiyan*_ YOUUUUU...'VE BEEN TELLING SHIT ABOUT BUGS, DIDNT YOU.... _*POINTS AT STUDENTS*_

 **Shuichi:** the hell, i didnt say anything about the bugs, are al- wait a second...

 

 **GONTA:** LOOK AT THIS POOR BUG, ITS FRIGHTENED _*goes to one student, takes him by arms and shows him to saihara*_

 **STUDENT:** EEK

 **Shuichi:** gonta, i think he's frightened by you, and did u srsly called student a bug

 **Gonta:** YUS. mR kork said that our students are actually _bugs_ , who were turned into _humans_

 

 **Shuichi:** lil piece of crap, so thats his plan to protect students huh

 **Gonta:** U WILL NOT HARM THOSE STUDENTS ANY LONGER _*STAnds ahead of students*_

 **Samantha:** oh my god he thinks we r bugs

 **Kotoko:** shUt up as long as we're protected its fine

 **Shuichi:** oh gonta pWeASE, u r nothing to me

 **Shuichi:** and when i said to me, i meant to monaca. green gemlin, go bite him

 **Monaca:** i am sorry my adoptive father i only do orders of my true daddy

 **Shuichi:** adoptive what. kokichi should stop fantasing about us

 **GONTA:** SO? WHAT WILL YOU DO?

 **SHuichi:** aLRIGHT, ILL DO THE LESSON. So everyone, tell me how much it will take kaito to drop his addicts

 **Kotoko:** wh --

 **Nagisa:** oh my god we really cant have a normal lesson can we

 **SHUICHI:** tELL ME

 

**Kotoko, Nagisa, Baleron and rest of the students stares at Gonta.**

 

 **Baleron:** cant u do something!??

 **Gonta:** why? isnt this kind of questions mr saihara should ask?

 **Kotoko:** do u even know what he should be teaching.

 **Gonta:** um-

 **Shuichi:** im teaching practical knowledge

 **Gonta:** exactly!

 **Students:** ...

 

 

**•teachers are actually VERY worried about this situation, but due to saihara's experience with his class they feel too bad to do something about it. tho, they also dont like how this situation starts to looks worse every day, so maybe they will taking their moves soon..**

**•since amami got kicked out, no one knows what amami does now, but he often walks around the school with shady people.** **.**

**•remember in the beginning it said that kokichi replaces shuichi's gun with random objects? One time, he accidentaly replaced it with SHUICHI'S BOXERS. As soon as kokch realised it, he grabbed those boxers and throw them thru window**

**"shuichi: did you just toss my fking boxers thru wind-**

**KOKICHI: NO, MAYBE, I DUNNO, BYE *runs away***

**•shuichi wasnt that suprised. he was only a bit worried hOW kokichi got his boxers**

**•kokichi leaving monaca with him became a habit now.**

**•shuichi is still very worried about why monaca said shuichi is his adoptive daughter.**

**•shuichi knows vry well about kokch's feelings. wont do anything about them tho.**

**•also why the hecc last points are focused only around oumasai-**

**•also amami looks like he's emo in gang now**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY, ITS SUPER SHORT CHAPTER THIS TIME, BUT DON'T WORRY, THE NEW ONE WILL BE UPDATED SOON AND WILL BE MUCH LONGER (and yay characters will finally discuss what should they do with shuichi).


	6. In principal's office, KORK NEEDS A PLAN.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The situation with shuichi is going only worse and worse, and finally kork decides he need to put an end to it, so he gathers his sweet dear teachers to his office...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!  
>  an actual thinking in a crack fic?  
> ITS MORE LIKELY THAN U THINK

Quick summary: since Shuichu got his premission to carry around his gun at school, he's been doing nothing more that threatens his students with it, whenever the thought they are making fun of him, as they used to. However, the situation is becoming less pleasant than kork thought it would be, and kokichi's plan with taking gun from shuichi isnt going well.

 

**Most of the teachers, gathered in the principal's office, again.**

**Kork the principal:** okay we have a problem

 **Miu:** well no shit sherlock

 **Kork:** but before we will talk about the obvious problem we need to talk about rantaro's case

 **Angie:** oh gosh what again

 **Kork:**  So, we all know that he deserted, and later on i kicked him out, right? and when he came to gets of the school screaming "this school sucks fucc im emo look at me just give me some attention dammit pls guys im dying inside why u dont love me".

 

 **kokichi:** _*chokes, literally*_

 **KORK:** DONT INTERRUPT ME

 **KOKICHI:** NO I - _*CHOKES*_  ITS NOT LAUGHTER, IM ACTALLY CHOKING , STEWS, DYING _*STILL CHOKES*_

 **kork** : ...

 **KOKICHI:** H E L P- _*FALLS on floor*_

 **kork:** someone carry him out

 **miu:** uh no

 **gonta:** ILL DO FIRST AID

 **kork:** ok but the kiss part leave to some girl

 **kaede** : ok that was fking sexist

 

_**(kaede, music teacher:** _

-skeptical

-annoyed

-"shut up"

-Aka maki but more selfish)

 

 **author:** leave the mouth to mouth part to me

 **kork:** who the fucc say this

 **author:** nvm just pretend u didnt see me

 **KAEDE:** WHO THE FUCC

 **author:** _*taking ouma*_ just wait a sec ill give him some potions

 

**Ouma disappears into the void with author.**

 

 **kork:** ...

 **miu:** ....

 **kork:** i am more than utterly scared

 **kaede:** ...

 **kaito:** ... _* hic*_

 **ryoma** : ...

 

 **ryoma:** so, wanna talk about ca-

 **KORK:** NOT NOW RYOMA. ANYWAY, BACK TO TOPIC: RANTARO TILL NOW WAS ALWAYS ALONE SAYING SHIT ABOUT OUR SCHOOL, BUT YESTERDAY, HE ACTUALLY CAME WITH A _GROUP OF WEIRD PEOPLE, AND THEY HAD BATS AND SHIT WITH THEM_

 **miu:** ew shit

 **KORK:** NOT LITERALLY DAMMIT. look the point is: THEY ACTUALLY CAN DO SOMETHING SERIOUS LATER, AND IF WE WON'T DO SOMETHING SOON, WE'LL BE FUCKED

 **kaITO:** ALrIGHT *hic*

 **kork:** i dont need UR confirmation.

 **miu:** alright, we got it, whats next?

 **kork:** well, next i wanted mention the obvious problem

 **tsumugi, the secretary:** aka obv problem, ok noted, u can continue

 **kaito:** wth, did u actually have tsumugi to write all the shits we talking about??

 **tsumugi:** ya sucks isnt. but at least it looks like some kind of fanfic

 **kaito:** wai what fanfic

 **tsumugi:** u kno, i can simply write ur names and say what u say instead of typical writing, write 3 dots and stuff, and write as fast as i can so there's barely any description

...

 **tsumugi:** its rly fun

 **kaito:** it somehow sounded so sad

 **TSUMUGI:** COUGH, KORK, SAY UR SHIT

 **KORK** : ILL SAY MY SHIT- WAI WHA

...

 **KORK:** FUCK IT, EVERYONE, WE JUST NEED TO DO SOMETHING WITH DAMN SAIHARA BECAUSE WE'RE GONNA BE FUCKED

 **kaito** : wait whats going on with saihara

 **kaede:** oh my god ur fking kidding right

 **KAITO:** NO IM NOT, I WAS DRUNK 24/7 THOSE DAYS, I DONT REMEMBER ANYTHING

 **kork:** oh fuck- anyway, saihara...

 

**Suddenly, kokichi appears kicked out from void by author**

 

 **Ryoma:** So, how was the void?

 **KOKICHI** :AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 

 **kork:** wh kokch-

 **KOKICHI:** _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA_

 **KAEDE:** SHUT U-

 **KOKICHI:** _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA_

**kork:** ok so lets just ignore him and talk about saihara

 **KOKICHI:** _**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA**_

 **kork:** kurwa

 **kaede:** eng pls

 **kork:** anyway, since saihara got his premission to carry his gun with him, granted by me which i regret deeply, we got nothing but problems.

 **kork** : till now, saihara has been doing nothing more than threaten our students in self defence, which was fine because that was part of the deal, however as the time passes, i am afraid, he might actually SHOOT to our students.

 **goNTA:** HE ALMOST DID THAT. HE ALSO SHOT A BIRD

 **RYOMA:** NO, NOT A BIRD-

 **Ryoma:** oh no wait i thought you said cat

...

 **ryoma:** guys can you stop going silent whenever i say something. it really hurts my feelings.

...

 **ryoma:** *goes hang himself*

 **GONTA:** NO-

 **KORK:** BULLSHIT U WONT DIE HERE, POLICE THIS TIME WILL CLOSE THIS SCHOOL THIS FOR SURE IF U DO THIS

 **ryoma:** ur fking assholes, im on saihara's side

 **kork & angie &miu & kaede:** wai wha

 **KOKCH:** FUCC YES - OH GOD NO THE TRAUMA ** _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA_**

 **kork:** ok seriously he needs to go to the therapist bc he cant even talk

 **author:** i'll take him

 **kork:** alright u ghost that suddenly appears

 **author:** no problem bud

 

**Author takes kokch to the therapist, when suddenly, the mailman kiibo appears.**

 

 **KIIBO:** i AM HERE I GOT LETTERS

 **KORK:** NOT NOW

 **KIIBO:** BUT LETTERS

 **KORK:** NO

 **KIIBO:** LETTERS CANT WAIT MY FRRIEND YAY

**kiibo shoves letters into kork's face**

**kork: _JDSAKLJDLKASJDLKASJDLAKSJDLKSD_**

**kIIBO:** LETTERS FOR EVERYONE YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAY  _*THROWS LETTERS TO AIR*_

 **KIIBO:** YAYAYAYYAYAYYAY GO READ THEM

silence

 **kiibo:** owo so what r u all doing?

 **kork:** _*cries*_ we are  trying to do something with saihara

 **kiibo:** :ooo whot happened??

 **kaede:** basically we're afraid he might go nuts with his gun and start shoot to students

 **kiibo:** oh nuuuuu ;~;

silence

 

 **kork:** so anyway ... _*tries to recover his mental health*_

 **kork:** we gotta do something about it quick. thanks to gonta, we know for sure that our students indeed have a protection, but for how long?

 **Gonta:** gONTA can prottec those little bugs!

 **kork:** yeah about that

**Korekiyo calls to himself all of the teachers close, besides gonta and kiibo.**

**kiibo:** owo ?

 **kork:** _*whispers*_ guys idk how long he will believe that our students were actually bugs that got transformed into humans

 **Tsumugi:** that's only ur fault

 **kaede:** ya u didn't fking have to lie to him then

 **kork:** I HAD TO, u know gonta hates student because he thinks they hate bugs. way too sensitive

 **angie:** well congrats bitch, and now ur gonna b fucked up when gonta will find out about that

 **kork:** i know _*starts crying*_

 **Kaito:** lol u crying totally matches the colour of my soul

 **gonta, interrupting:** hey, why u all talking with urselfes...? ARE U TALKING SHIT ABOUT BUGS?

 **kork, shoving off the teachers:** NO

 **gonta:** oh okay then

...

 **kork:** (maybe he wont find out about it then)

 **kork:** so, any ideas what we can do about shui-

**The doors open, and kokichi appears in them and enters**

**kiibo:** owo hewwo ouwma

 **kokichi:** _*goes hugs kiibo*_

 **kiibo:** YAYAYAYAYAY _*hugs ouma back*_

 

 **kork:** so, cough, how was ur therapy, that apperantly took less than 2 minutes?

 **kokichi, letting go of kiibo:** suprisingly good, i feel much more relieved and calm. i think i can take any kind of shit there is.

 **kork:** well thats good then

 **kiibo:** yaya uwu

 **kokichi:** actually, what is kiibo doing here?

 **KIIBO:** OwO? Want a letter?

 **kokichi:** maybe

**Kiibo, start searching letter for kokichi in his bag.**

**Kiibo:** ... there isn't any letter for u;~;

 **kokichi:** -,-

 **kiibo:** im sorry ;~~;

 **kork:** alright, so in any case, lets talk about what we can do with shuichi. kiibo, since you're here, you can throw some ideas too.

 **kiibo:** yaya owo

 

 **kaede:** so like... can we just take his gun?? that seems to be the most obvious option

 **kork:** kaede sweet summer child, do u actually think shuichi will just drop the gun??

 **kaede** : i mean, he isnt stupid- plus wait, didnt kokichi took the gun from him like 10 thousands times??

 **KOKICHI:** WELL. He was always getting new gun somehow, so i just stopped doing that... Instead, i was just leaving monaca with him.

 **Kaede:** wait. Then whats the point of us taking gun from him?

 

 **Kork:** well to be honest, first of all i just want him to let go of his gun, pin him down and ask from  _where_ he was taking those guns, and then  destroy his sources. But we gotta take that gun from him first, since he will obviously aim at us with it if we tell him that he cant use his gun anymore.

 **kork:** also him letting of his gun wont probably happen, since he treats the gun as his own child, i was informed by kokichi

 **kokch:** ugh what i have seen there (gosh i wish i was that gun)

 **miu:** (wai what the fu u actually want him to treat u like his son??)

 **KOKCH:** (WHY NOT?? I NEED SOME FAMILY LOVE DAMMIT)

 **miu:** (wai but when i said i could be ur mommy-)

 **KOKCH:** (MOM SHUT UP.)

 **miu:** (i thought u wanted him to b ur lover but whatever)

 **kokch:** (lover AND daddy is neat combination)

 **miu:** (thats not how i raised u my child)

 **kokch:** (u didnt fking raise me fucc)

 **kork:** miu, kokichi, stop developing ur characters and relationship and lets focus a bit

 **miu & kokch:** cri

 **miu:** wait but anyway... what we know for sure, is the fact that shuichi won't give his gun to us, and he will probably aim at us if we decide to ask him to give it 

 **kork:** yeah, so thats basically wont work. its pretty shitty, but however i must say this- i am afraid we will have to take the gun from him forcibly.

 **ANGIE:** _*GASP*_

 **GONTA:** WOAH

 **KOKICHI:** HEY, DONT U DARE HURTING HIM . without my premission

 **kork:** what

 **miu** : what

 **gonta:** what

 **Tsumugi:** _*cHOKES*_ I THINK IM DYING GUYS- NO, LITERALLY, TAKE ME TO HOSPITAL

 **angie:** what

 **kokichi:** i mean ,,, i know that it won't be possible to do this mission without hurting him but like ,,, i dont want u to hurt him more than its nessecary?

 **kokichi:** it was to you kork, i still remember when u slapped him for no reason

 **kork:**..........

 **Tsumugi:** _*gasps for air*_

..........

 **ryoma:** so since things are awkward, and im super awkward, which means i can shine the most in awkward moments, ill speak now. So how about we make a trap, and then we corner shuichi?? or, someone could catch him and hold so he wouldnt take his gun. gonta could do this for example, or tenko but we would have to call her.

...

 **kaede** : wait why r we silent its actually good idea

 **ryoma:** i mean YOU LITERALLY SAID ABOUT TAKING THAT GUN WITH FORCE FROM HIM, HOW DID YOU EXPECT TO DO THIS OTHERWISE???

...

 **ryoma:** i am so done with you people

...

 **kork:** so, we can actually take his idea, and make that trap. how however??

 **Author:** wait a sec _*takes tsumugi to hospital*_ ok u can continue

 **Kokichi** :...

 

 **kokichi:** well, the most obvious thing to do would be to start the operation where there wouldn't be any students nearby.

 **kork:** so, the best thing would be to do that after school... now, where??

 **angie:** maybe in the cortyard? there isn't much space, so i think it would b an advance for us. plus, if we can corner saihara from two sides if things will go right, and im sure it wouldnt be a problem for gonta to take care of him.

 **kokichi:** i mean, what if he will shot us, while we will be trying to corner him? i think gonta should attack him first, before we will show, and take him down.

 **kaede:** yeah, but shuichi now is super paranoid, and he will aim his gun at literally _everything_ what moves. are we SURE he won't notice gonta attacking him, who's super big?

 **kork:** so... what are you saying, is the fact that we should distract him first, and make him to loose his guard?

 **kaede** : yeah but that's pretty risky, since if shuichi will notice that something isn't right, he will be extra paranoid, and then its totally won't work.

 

 **angie:** then, we have to make sure that he won't notice anything. so, the person who should distract him, should it be kokichi? they seemed to get along pretty well.

 **kokichi** : yeah but... since that gun thing we haven't spoken much, ive been just trying to take as much guns from him as i could. remember? but whenever i took his gun, he was always getting new, and... well that didn't work out.

 **angie:** so in other words, if shuichi will see kokichi who wasn't on his side when it came to gun and threating others thing, he will be suspicious for sure, why would you talk to him all of the suden.

 **kokichi:** i mean i could _ALWAYS_ pretend that i have a thing to tell him from a principal, but because things r weird between us, he won't let his guard for sure, so basically its pointless.

 **kaede:** alright, so how about the person who should distract him, will be instead of his well known friend, a totally random person?

 **angie:** the person that shuichi won't even think to be suspicious around... yeah that might work.. but who tho?? he knows most of the people of this school well, i don't he will be-

 **kiibo:** owo?

 **angie:** nevermind, i think we got a perfect person to do this task

 **kiibo:** ;.; ?

 **Kaito:** i feel so bad for u rn

 

 **kaede:**  Alright, but we need to talk more about details. So, gonta will attack him once he will lower his guard and will be vulnerable to sneaking, right? However, gonta is TOO big for sneaking, and it would be hard anyway to run to him without making any noises.. even with shuichi's lowered guard.

 **angie:** the solution is pretty simply, actually. all we have to do, is to _hide_ gonta somewhere close, close to the spot where kiibo will be distracting shuichi. However, we need to make sure he will attack at the moment when shuichi will be off guard, otherwise he will notice gonta for sure. But to be honest... i don't know if gonta would feel the right moment to attack.

 **gonta:** gonta... gonta agrees...

 **Kaito:** dude ,,

 

 **kaede:** so, in other words, we have to make sure to LET gonta know, when he can attack. there are some ways to do this, but this must be quick and silent so shuichi won't notice... how about, some kind of lighting?

 **angie:**  a light?

 **kaede:** yeah, gonta would have some kind of small flashlight, and once shuichi will be off the guard, we will could make the flashlight lighten up a bit, so gonta would notice, and attack him then.

 **angie:** in that case, we need to make sure that some of us will be watching the whole scene, somewhere close, thats for sure, to notice any changes in shuichi.

 

 **kaede:** are we sure there NEEDS to be someone close  there? we have the cameras in school, right?

 **kork:** actually... we have but... the sound doesnt work there so...

 

 **kaede:** oh great, from just looking it would be hard to know when shuichi will be off guard.

 **angie:** i mean we could tell it from the body language and expression, so it wouldn't be much of a problem, really. But we still won't be able to actually know situation from there.

 **kokichi:**  so how about, changing the original camera to the one that also records sound?

 **kork:** this isnt a bad idea, however, if shuichi will see us installing the new camera, he WILL know that something is up. plus, knowing how paranoid he is, he will notice the different camera.

 **kaede:** well, then we can always buy a similiar model then, or just... order the exact camera as the cameras we have, but with the recording sound function.

 **kork:** well it will cost a lot, but there isnt really much choice. anyway, if we have the problem with different looking cameras solved, when will be installing it? once shuichi will notice it, the plain is ruined.

 **kokichi:** in that case, we will simply do it when shuichi will be having classes with his students.

 **kork:** but isn't shuichi is more than just unstable? there's actually a huge possibility that he will just walk out of the class, for some of his reasons...

 **kokichi:** oh don't worry about that, since the gun thing monaca often spends time in his classes to watch him from doing anything stupid to his students (good daughter). if she will see shuichi going out of the class, she will inform me with the phone, or something.

 **kork:** but are we sure that shuichi WON'T notice monaca doing something suspicious then?

 **kokichi:** well, monaca is super suspicious with her chainsaw already, so i don't think he would pay much attention.

 **kaede:** well, in that case, shouldnt she be the best one to distract him? if as u said he got used to her antics, he might be not suspicious of her.

 **kokichi:** uh maybe, but there is a chance that she will remind him of me, since she's my damn adoptive daughter, and uh, since that gun replacing thing... i doubt shuichi will believe that monaca went to see him without me asking for it. but in the other hand... if she would accidentaly meet him, then... who knows.. it could actually work.. plus monaca is good actor, so she wouldnt have much problems to not act more suspicious than she already is.

 **kork:** huh, "so suspicious that not suspicious" thing, huh? but again, kiibo would do this with no problem too, since his apperance...

 **kiibo:** ;.; will i have to do something?

 **kork:** but in the end, he's kinda too innocent to just pretend like everything's fine, and if we ask him i don't know if we will get an honest anwser...

 **kiibo:** i mean i guess could, but... ;_;

 **kork:** also, are sure that monaca will do the task for us??

 **kokichi:** oh please ur talking like u havent seen the previous parts of this fic. she will do anything i tell her.

 **kork:** well that is true... but again, monaca would have to do the chit chat, and we all know that monaca isn't this kind of person... so sending there monaca to make shuichi relaxed, could make the opposite results...

 **kork:** again, the safest option would be kiibo but... KIIBO KNOWS ABOUT THIS PLAN, AND I DUNNO IF HE CAN PRETEND LIKE HE DID NOT??

 **kokichi:** yeah. crap

 **kaede:** gosh darnit.

 **Tsumugi that returned from hospital:** well shit

 

 **angie:** how about we will erease a memory of this plan?

 **kiibo:** nuuuuu- wait his might actually work out ;.;

 **kaede:** wait, so you are actually agreeing to do let ur memory be ereased?

 **kiibo:** i mean i could... ;~;

 **kaede:** gosh darnit ur too nice, now i feel bad.

 **kokichi:** hey, but there is an alternative. we all know that kiibo won't be able to act like his usual self under this stress, but he can say its because of _something else_. for example, shuichi is super paranoid, so kiibo can lie that he's nervous because he's afraid that he _did something to shuichi_. WE ALL KNOW THIS COULD ACTUALLY HAPPEN.

 **kaede:** huh that is some idea, what do you think kiibo?

 **kiibo:** yaya uwu

 **kiibo:** but im still afraid tho ;~;

 **kaede:** don't worry kiibo, there's is actually very low chance that he will be suspicious of you

 **angie:** (there is?)

 **kaede:** (no, but kiibo doesn't need to know, because he also needs to feel comfortable if this plan can work out.)

 **kaede:** so, how about this kiibo? im sure shuichi won't be much suspicious of you anyway, so i think there's no need for you to be nervous!

 **kiibo:** ... ;.; i don't know...

 **kaede** : i mean, you already made the ur impression for shuichi, and this is the impression of someone who wouldn't do anything bad. plus for him ur completely not involved in anything that happened with the gun or the school that made him to go nuts.

 **kiibo:** ;~~~~; okay...

 **kokichi:** oh ya kaede, about that.

 **kaede:** hm?

 **kokichi:** after that i'll slap you all, and all students and you won't stop me.

 **kaede:** wh-

 **kokichi:** its basically all ur fault because none of you have done anything to stop that bullying, even u korekiyo, even tho, ur supposed to be a principal and taking care of those stuff.

 **kork:** ...

 **kokichi:** oh well thats all from me. so, when do we start the plan?

 **kork:** ... well, as fast as we can, so tomorrow would be the best, but after taking that order for that camera it might take a while.

 

 **ANGIE:** WAIT A SEC, WE'RE SO DUMB

 **kork, kokch, kaede:** ehh??

 **ANGIE:** WE CAN JUST ASK MIU TO MODIFY CAMERAS FOR US

 **KORK, KOKCH, KAEDE:** _*FACEPALMS*_

 **MIU:** WAIT A SEC, I WOULD NEED TIME TO DO THIS, AND WHEN IF WE'RE STARTING THE PLAN TOMORROW?

 **ANGIE:** WELL OBVIOUSLY, YOU WILL DO IT THIS TODAY AT NIGHT

 **MIU:** GOD FKING OKAY THATS GOOD PLAN

 **KORK:** WAIT- school isnt safe at night

 **ryoma:** wait really? don't tell me shuichi-

 **kork** : noooo, its not about shuichi (u lucky that we dont have time for akward silences), but about rantaro.

 **Kork:** i told u on the beginning that he started to appear that weird group. honestly, i didn't lie when i said im afraid that they will do something horrible soon.

 **Still kork:** i  think more people should stay in school at night, just to keep miu and this place safe.

 **kaede:** well, we can always leave her gonta, when he goes super sayian idk if there would b anyone to stop him

 **GONTA:** ITS FKING SSJ BLU BISH- but gonta think u might b right- however gonta doesn't think he will be able to do it, because gonta want to do something else.

 **kork:** oh my god, what is -

 **gonta:** gonta want to go to tenko to train sneak attacks, so there would be lower chance of shuichi noticing gonta's sneak attack!

 **kork:** oh okay that seems more than fair. wait, then who will stay at school? we need someone with fighting experience (tenko naturally doesnt count, she's not even working in this school and is busy with her own life)

 **ryoma:** i mean i like killed all mafia guys so like killing some emo gang bitches wouldn't be too hard

...

...

...

...

 **kork:** why did i let you be a teacher again?

 **ryoma:** ...

...

 **kork:** _*cough*_ okay but don't u dare to kill anybody this time, just make sure they will lose consciousness.

...

 **kork:**  but, if anything were actually to happen, CONTACT US IMMEDIATELY, GOT IT? Also Im still anxious, Angie, you will watch this place too, you can take kaede with you

 **Angie:** sure lol

 **RYOMA:** ALRIGHT BITCH.

...

 

 **Kork:** alright so... disband guys for now, i'll call you all later to talk about more details, about which cortyard use and when exactly plan will start. to be honest, i think we all need some kind of break rn

 **angie:** oh god yes _*streches*_

 **miu:** and how neat that some of us didnt even say anything lel

 **ryoma:** i mean, i wanted but

...

 **ryoma:** exactly

...

 **kaede:** i mean that was wise decision

...

 **KAEDE:** GUYS WTF, DONT B SILENCE WITH ME?!?!?

...

 **RYOMA:** AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOOOOOOSER

 **KAEDE:** NOOOOOOOO

...

 **kork:** alright everyone, u can go now, we will meet this evening, but make sure to leave the school when shuichi will see you, so he wouldn't be suspicious of us staying in school so late. (also make sure to return the way shuichi wouldnt notice u too but thats obv). and after that, tomorrow, after school, we will start the plan.

 **miu:** aye

 **angie:** just to be sure - shuichi WON'T come back to school at the night for some weird reason, right?

 **kokichi:** dont worry, we'll just make monaca to watch his house

 **angie:** oh of course

 **kork:** okay out guys, i need to scream for a bit, and i think yall too

 **ryoma:** i cant scream. i was screaming thru my life for way too long to have any screams left.

 **kork:** well shit

 **kaede:** omg u srsly didnt ignore him??

...

 **KAEDE:** NO WAY GUYS!?!??!

...

 **KORK:** OUT OF MY OFFICE

 

And so, the cast ran out of kork's office, and tried to do their stuff calmly. gonta tried to avoid shuichi, but miu told him it wasn't a good idea. while kiibo, returned to doing his job, giving his letters to people and holding bacc tears from what is going to happen tomorrow. While saihara...

 

 **saihara, in his class:** _*coughs*_

 **saiHARA:** DID SOMEONE SAY- oh no wait it was just me coughing

 **class:** ...

 **saihara:** ... _*stares*_

 **class:** *terrified, but does their stuff*

 

  * **tenko aint as bitchy about boys as she used to, so she will probably help gonta out.**
  * **however, kork doesn't want tenko to know exactly about their situation since it isn't something to be so proud of, so he told gonta to be quiet about it.**
  * **also now kaede is the awkward one**
  * **ryoma has fully raisen from shadows and dust and now he shines again in the full glamor of the sun, as the phoenix**
  * **amami gathers his emo gang...**
  * **kokichi WILL slap everyone in the shool. especially kork and the students.**



 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AFTER consideration i think tenko would be MUCH more suited for the task instead of gonta, so i was thinkking about adding her in the next chapter to take gonta's place, but then, what exactly would be her reason for helping out?? she isn't a teacher of that school, so she didn't see any of v3 cast for a while, which means she isn't so close to them anymore, not to mention she have now her own life too, so she have actually no actual reason for helping out them with something what THEY actually caused, because of their ignorance... plus principal is kork, the man, the degenerate. a cheap way to do it, would b just adding a reason including himiko, but...  
> tho, i think i just got another idea... (yeah its the gonta learning sneak stuff from tenko- ye i write notes with weird timing<.<)


	7. everything ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IT'S HAPPENING!!!!

Surprisingly, to what Principal Kork have been thinking, the night at schiol have been calm, and thankfully, there seemed to be none of Rantaro's signs

"Good" he thought "good good" he thought again

 

 **Kaede:** shouldnt we return to our old format- it would be confusing if we would start using that all of sudden

 

"goddamit " he haven't thought

 

 **Kaede:** whatever, let us focus

 

It was morning. Yesterdey, after discussing their plan, he told all teachers to gather again in the morning, in his office.

 

 **Gonta:** gonta have returned from tenko, he can now do sneak attaccs.

 **Kork:** sweet. Ok guys, Miu finished modifying cameras for us, so almost everything's ready. Now, all we gotta discuss is where to hide gonta

 **Kaede:** no, first we gotta discuss which cortyard we will use

 **Angie:** agrees

 **Miu:** but shouldnt we b all silent when kaede speaks now-

 **Angie:** screw it, unlike ryoma we need her smart ass

 **Kaede:** ha

 **Ryoma:** fucc

 

 **Kork:** well anyway- I was thinking that we could use courtyard, close to Ryoma's class. The legends says that once you will pass by it, you will feel a wave of awkwardness - so none of the students goes there

 **Ryoma:** screw y'all, I'm the one liked by students the most

 **Miu:** _*cough*_ so about hiding gonta-

 

  And so, to made this quick , because our author doesn't want to test readers' patience, they proceed to talk about two possibilities. First was, to hide him in the closet, and make saihara to go close to it, while he would talk to kiibo.

  However, there wasn't any closets in the courtyards, so they would have to put there one, and since saihara is paranaoic about everything, it would be hard to make him go close to the weird closet he sees for the first time, since there could be students hiding there , ready to attack him.

  After dissmising that idea, they've came up with the new one. There was a few windows in that courtyard, and they all should be open, since it's summer, so mr saihara shouldn't be that much suspicious of them. Eventually he would be from birds, but only that. The plan says, make saihara turn him away from windows so he wouldn't look at them, and in that time, when saihara would be off guards, Gonta, who has been hiding outside of the building, near to the window, grabbing something beneath of it, after getting a signal in form of lighting, of a little flashlight, he would climb fast, grab window railing, and jump thru window and finally, attack. Then, after taking his gun away, the teachers would come.

 

 **Kork:** okay, that seems to be it , and now- kiibo my boi

 **Kiibo:** ?? ;~;

 **Kork:** you know what u gotta do, ur job is to distract saihara. And look, if saihara will want to to bullshit u in something... Just go with it. HE needs to be calm, remember?

 **Kiibo** : ,., okay...

 **Kaito:** dood I'm gonna srsly start feel bad for him.

 **Angie:** ok, so when do we start?

 **Kork:** well, we gotta hide Gonta first, so we'll do that soon, exactly when saihara will be having classes with his students. Also make sure kokch to send there monaca, so she will watch him

 **Kokch:** got it, jim

 **Kork:** I am not Jim.

 **Kokch:** whatever. What's after that?

 **Kork:** Well, after that, we will gotta lure Saihara to courtyard, near to Ryoma's classrooms. I was gonna start the plan after school when there will be no students, but thanks to Ryoma's classrooms presence, the whole courtyard is so awkward, that nobody goes there, so that should do the job.

 **Ryoma:** ...

 **Tsumugi:** no, wait, and how you're gonna lure shuichi to that courtyard without making him suspicious??

 **Ryoma:** I'll take care of it. I'm too awkward to be suspicious, and I'm sure even succi knows that.

...

 **Tsum:** seems legit.

 **Kork:** ok, sweet? Sweet! No gtfo and wait until end of the classes

 **Tsum:** wait, but didn't we established that we'll do that sooner in awkward courtyard, so we won't have to wait for students to go home-

 **Kork:** who cares about them

 **Tsum:** What.

 **Kork:** whot

<><><><><><>

**AFTER CLASSES!**

 

After another shuichi's torment towards his students, gonta kun finally reached awkward courtyard, and then get thru window to the outside. He went down a bit, making sure that window railing will be close and fast to grab.

Shuichi, who just finished his classes, was preparing to leave when...

 

 **Shuichi:** WHO U FUCKER- oh hello ryoma, pls don't make this aw-

 **Ryoma:** _*comes to classroom*_ I came

**Shuichi:**

**Ryoma:** in classroom

 **Shuichi:** !?????

 **Ryoma:** i meant to classroom

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **ryoma:** with my legs and shoes

 **Shuichi:** _...!?!?!?!?!_

 **Ryoma:** (oh my God) wanna see something cool

 **Shuichi:** wh-

 **Ryoma:** it's something small

 **Shuichi:** JFC R U FUCKED UP-

 **RYOMA:** I MEANT KITTENS FOR GODDamn SAKE AT LEAST LET ME FINISH

 **Shuichi:** O H

 

 **Ryoma:** so

 **Ryoma:** wanna to my basement? That's where I hide kittens, so no will hear when they scream...

 **shuichi:** _*slowly gets terrified*_

 **Ryoma:** ...for food, or when they want someone to play with them -,-

 **Shuichi:** OH-

 **Ryoma:** and by basement I meant my classroom. It's so quiet there because a no one goes there, so we call it basement

 **Shuichi:** oh okay-

Ryoma: so wanna go there?

 **Shuichi :** I MEAN, we dont really talk often so-

 **Ryoma:** we can always get to know each other better _*deep rYoma voice*_

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **Ryoma:** come. Its real fun.

 **Shuichi:** no thx, I think I should go-

 **RYOMA:** _COME, SHUICHI. KITTENS ARe rEALLY FUN_

 **SHUICHI:** I

 **Ryoma:** pls I'm so lonely

**Shuichi :**

**Shuichi :**

**Shuichi:** o k ? ? ;----;

 

And so, shuichi started to follow ryoma, making sure he was at least 2m ahead.

And so they made it to an awkward courtyard, with camera modified, and gonta was already hiding...

 

 **Shuichi:** why all windows are open?

 **Ryoma:** to ventilate awkwardness.

 **Shuichi:** seems legit

 

 **Ryoma:** also is it just me , or you don't have ur gun-

 **Shuichi:** _*kissing the gun*_ excuse me what

 **Ryoma:** wait u don't need that now tho, the students went to home

 **Shuichi:** SHH! Did u hear that?

 **Ryoma:** no I'm not sure-

 **Shuichi:** it's the sound of our students peeking on us. We're never safe.

 **Ryoma:** (and why they call me the weird one again-)

 **Ryoma:** anyway, wait here shuichi , I'll go to get the kittens

 **Shuichi:** but werent we supposed to go to base- I meant class

 **Ryoma:** silly shuichi, u might catch the awkwardness there

 **Shuichi:** i- seems legit

 **Ryoma:** wait here then and don't move. I'll bring the girls

 **Shuichi** :...

 **Ryoma:** ... THe ki- nvm

 

And so, Ryoma entered the classroom.

 

**Meanwhile!**

The screen room with screens. All of the teachers have gathered there and are watching the situation thru that one camera.

 

 **Kaito:** I feel so bad for ryoma rn

 **Kokch:** tfu, if the plan will go well I'll b in much worse situation than this.

 **Kaito:** wai wha

 **Tsum:** stfu y'all, I'm trying to watch

 **KORK:** TSUMUGI PUT DOWN THAT POPCORN, THIS IS SERIOUS

 **TSUM:** _*THROWS ALL POPCORN AT KORK*_ THERE U GO U FKING BISH

 **KORK:** _*TAKES THE THING THAT WAS POPCORN IN AND SHOVES IT ON TSUM'S HEAD*_

 **TSUM:** MY EYES, IM BLIND, DADDY HELP

 **KORK:** who's the daddy

 **Tsum:** i dunno im spitting random bullshit when panicking

 **Kaede** : oh so that's why u were calling us fictional characters

 **Kokch:** SHADDUP, look at the cameras, kiibo's coming.

 

**MEANWHILE WITH SUCCI.**

Shuichi was waiting for the ryoma to come back, till sudenely...

 

 **Kiibo:** _*SCREECH*_

Kiibo rolls on the floor as if he was thrown, and then hitted the wall.

 **Kiibo:** BWAH.

 **Shuichi:** WHAT. _*aims at kiibo*_

 **Kiibo:** LE- HOLY SHI M8 PUT THAT GUN DOWN- ANYWAY LETTERS

 **SHUICHI:** WHAT LETTERS- THE HECK U DOING KIIBO HERE

 **KIIBO:** I SAID IT. LETTERS.

 **SHUICHI:** BUT WHY IT LOOKED LIKE U WERE THROWN HERE- IS SOMEONE THERE??

 **KIIBO:** NO IT WAS JUST THE LETTERS, AND MY NEED TO GIVE LETTERS TO PEOPLE THAT NEED THEM!!

 **SHUICHI:** wha-- I DONT NEED LETTERS, NOW GO AWAY.

 **kIIBO:** NO- ALSO SCREECH

 **SHUICHI:** WHA

 **KIIBO:** GUN

 **SHUICHI:** omg rly _*stops aiming at kiibo and hide it in pants*_

 

**mEANWHILE WITH KORK**

 

 **Kokichi:** oh god i want to be this gun so badly

 **Kork:** what

 **Kokch:** what

...

 **Miu:** i would not want that.

 **Miu:** also he hid his gun, how about giving gonta the signal now?

 **Kaede:** silly silly girl, we saw how he can quickly take his gun when he started to kiss it just a second ago

 **Kokichi:** oh god please let me be this gun

 **Kork:** stop fantasing in our presence

 **Kokch:** no

 **Kork:** -,-

 

 

**AND NOW TO SUCCI**

 

 **shuichi:** happy now? Can u give me that letter now so we can finish this? I'm waiting for kittens.

 **Kiibo:** whot-

 **Shuichi:** oh no, the ryoma awkwardness is getting to me. Anyway give the letter.

 **Kiibo:** umMMM okAY- (I'm doing terrible ain't I) but before that

 **Kiibo:** kokichi is srsly sorry for what happened to ur boxers-

 **SHUICHI:** DOES EVERYONE KNOWS THAT--

 

**MEANWHILE.**

KOKCH: KIIBO U FUCKER

**MEANOWHILEO**

 

 **shuichi:** u know what, fuck it, just give me the letter =,=

 **Kiibo:** ya. Yaya. _*gives him letter*_

 **Shuichi:** oh my God what the hell does he wants now.

 

**Shuichi opens the letter and sees:**

 

_"Be careful of Asian bitches."_

_\-- kokch (call me)_

 

**Shuichi: ...**

 

**Shuichi: ...**

 

**Shuichi: ...**

 

**Shuichi: ...**

 

**Shuichi:** ...

 **Shuichi:** I

 

**meaNWHILE**

 

 **miu:** maybe now?

 **Kokch:** no there's still more, so let's not take that risk

 

**SUCCI'S SIIIIIDE**

 

 **Shuichi:** oh my God there's still more

 

**kOKICHIIII AND KORKS SIDE**

 

 **KOKCH:** I CHANGED MY MIND, LETS STOP HIM NOW     

 **KORK:** WHAT WHY, YOU'VE SAID THAT THIS IS GREAT IDEA

 **KOKCH:** IT IS, BUT IT WILL RUIN MY REPUTATION FOREVER AND ILL NEVER GET SHUICHI TO FUCK ME NJDDJSJSJDJSJDBSK

 **KORK:** I MEAN-

 **MIU:** AS AN OUMASAI SHIPPER I CANT LET THIS HAPPEN, WE'RE GIVING THUS SIGNAL BUTTON

**MIU SMASHES THE SIGNAL BUTTON**

 

**MEANFUCKINGWHILE**

 

 **GONTA:** (GASP THE SIGNAL)

 

GONTA HAS GRABBED THE RAILING, CLIMBS, AND WHEN HE WAS IN FULL VIEW JUMPED ON SAIHARA, WHO WAS TURNED TO OPPOSITE DIRECTION

GONTA SUCCEFULY CAUGHT SAIHARA!

 

Now he holds him on the ground, prevent him from taking gun

 

 **KIIBO:** EEK

 **GONTA:** GONTA NOT WANNA DO THIS BUT GONTA GOTTA, BC GOTTA DO THEIR CRAP

 **SHUICHI:** STOP CONFUSING "GOTTA" WITH UR NAME. also the heck-

 **GONTA:** NOW GONTA NEEDS TO GET TO UR PANTS TO GET UR GUN

 

**MEANWHALE**

KOKCH: I CALL BULLSHIT ONLY I CAN DO THIS

 

**mEANAGAINWHILE**

KOKCH, after storming to saihara rest of teachers did the same.

 

 **Shuichi:** i swear to god, is this what was that about?? You want my gun??

 **KOKCH:** YOLO FKING SLUTS

 

KOKCH CAME (not in that way) JUMPING TO COURTYARD, AND THEN REST OF THE TEACHERS TOO.

 **Kaede:** yikes

 **Angie:** double yikes

 **Kaito:** OMG SHUICHI YOU'RE WORKING HERE!????

...

...

...

...

...

 **kork:** excuse me.

 **Kaito:** what, its my first time seeing him here-

 **Tsum:** kaito, do u remember anything when u were drunk?

 **Kaito:** duh

 **Kaito:** ofc not.

...

...

...

 **Kork:** why did i let u b the teacher again.

 **KOKCH:** CAN WE FOCUS THO

 **Miu:** what is this "focusing", u mention, it sounds tasty-

 **Kokch:** i-

 

Suddenly ryoma came.

To join his class.

And now even author feels cringe from that line.

 

 **Ryoma:** it aint my fault -,-

 **Shuichi:** ofc, there weren't any kittens, HOW CLEVER (not).

 **Kork:** hush hush everyone, let us go to the biseness, since gonta prevents him from taking gun

 **Kiibo:** why on the floor tho, it's dirty... ,.,

 **Kork:** u sweet summer child. ANYWAY, BACK TO BUSINESS. SUCCI-

 **shuichi:** ya?

 **Kork:** first, give us ur gun.

 **Shuichi** : I can't.

 **Kork:** why??

 **Shuichi:** bc gonta grabs my goddamn arms, that's why -,-

 **Kork :** oh-

 **Miu:** gonta get offa him

 **Kork:** no, succi will use that opportunity to shot us.

 **Shuichi:** no I wont

 **Miu:** no he wont

 **Kork:** can't believe you're that stupid.

 **Shuichi:** I mean I srsly won't

 **Kork:** uhhuh

 **Shuichi:** IM SERIOUS, U TREAT ME LIKE THIS WITHOUT EVEN GIVING ME A CHANCE TO SURRENDER.

 **Angie:** I would say that he's right, but given the situation we still can't trust him uwuwu

 **Shuichi:** -,-

 **Kokch:** unfortunately , same

 **Shuichi:** -,- even u kokch

 **Kaito:** wait but then what now-

 **Shuichi:** just take my gun. It aint in pants, its in pocket. Author made typo

 **Kork:** what typo-

 **Angie:** sounds like some excuse to make perv jokes

 **Gonta:** anyway- can someone get his gun?? If gonta were to do that, gonta would have to let go of his one arm

 **Kork:** u right, kaito, u go

 **Kaede:** but kaito is his friend, he cant go bc he might help shuichi

 **Kork:** k then tsumugi

 **Kaede:** she cant go, she's mastermind in canon game

 **Tsum:** u lil bitchcake

 **Kork:** k then ryoma

 **Shuichi:** pls no he's too awkward

...

 **Kork:** seems legit. K then uh miu

 **Shuichi:** no she's perveted

 **Kork:** k then Angie?

 **Shuichi:** k

 **Kokch:** wait but wasn't Angie kinky tho-

 **Shuichi:** eh only in love hotel

 **Tsum:** also kokch I thought u would want to do it

 **Kokch:** no, I ain't stupid or selfish, I know it isn't time for that

 **Shuichi:** that didn't stop u from sending me Asian ladybugs info. And what was further in the letter, was far more...

 **KoKCH:** OH MY GOD NO, DID U SEE THAT-

 **shuichi:** nah lol

 **Kokichi:** oh-

 **Kork:** stop developing ur characters' relationship, Angie go get the gun

 **Angie:** ayee... Crap. Give me more screen time.

 

Angie walks to shuichi, get his gun from pocket, and goes back to teachers.

 **Angie:** got the gun lol

 **Kaito:** i want to put smile on that gun. It looks so sad.

 **Angie:** oh okay- wai i dont give u this gun rn

 **Kaito:** ack-

 **Ryoma:** why do i wont say anything. It looks like we kinda lack ppl when only few characters talk.

 **Kiibo:** owo?

 **Ryoma:** better.

 **Kork:** ok it is done. Now time to be serious. Shuichi, from where you were getting this gun?

 **Shuichi:** why do u want to know?

 **Kork:** obviously, we are gonna destroy your sources. Sorry succi, but we can't let you wander around with gun anymore, it got too outta hand.

 **Shuichi:** ok

 **Kork:** wai wha-

 **Shuichi:** I said okay, I agree with u, it got too outta hand.

 **Kork:** umm-

 **Kokch:** wait rly-

 **Kaede:** did we took the situation too seriously...?

 **Angie:** hmm..

 **Kaito:** eh I say let him if he says so. Gonta get outta him, he's not dangerous anymore

 **Kork:** I mean-

 **Gonta:** well since shuichi doesn't have his gun, then...

 

Gonta gets up from shuichi...

Shuichi also stands...

**Shuichi: ...**

**Everyone: ...**

 

**...**

 

 **Gonta:** huh? Hey something is behind you...

 **SHUICHI:** MONACA, AS YOUR DADDY THAUGHT YOU

 **MONACA:** AYE AYE SECOND FATHER

 

SUDDENELY MONACA THE SNAKE APPEARS BEHIND ANGIE AND GRABS THE GUN WITH HER MOUTH. WHILE EVERYINE WAS CONFUSED SUCCI JUMPED AWAY FROM GONTA AS FAR AS HE COULD, AND THEN MONACA LIKE A DOGGY RUNNED OVER TO HIM, WITH HIS GUN STILL IN HER MOUTH

 **KORK:** GONTA DO SOMETHING-

 **MONACA:** GRRRRR

 **SHUICHI:** GIVE THAT GUN LIKE GOOD DOG _*STRUGGLES WITH TAKING GUN FROM HER, BUT HE MADE IT*_ YOLO BITCHES

 

SHUICHI AIMED HIS GUN AT THEM, WHILE MONACA TOOK OUT FROM SKIRT HER CHAINSAW

 **SHUICHI:** YAAHO Y'ALL AND WHAT NOW HUH

 **KIIBO:** SCREECH

 **MIU:** EEK

 **TSUMUGI:** EXCUSE ME-

 **KAEDE:** WHAT-

 **KORK:** JFC PUT THOSE DOWN PLS

 **SHUICHI:** N-

 

 **KOKCH:** NO WAIT A GODDAMN SECOND, MONACA WHAT THE FUCK??

 **MONACA:** I'm sorry my daddy but shuichi said he will marry you in future which means he'll be my daddy which means I can now count him as a daddy too. And as my new daddy I decided to give him extra services  

 **Shuichi:** don't put this that way.

 **KOKCH:** EXCUSE ME, WHAT THE.. WAIT WHAT FUCK, SHUICHI SAID HE WILL DO WHAT-

 

and then while monaca wasn't looking, shuichi, bring hand to his neck and did the gesture that says "ur dead" to kokichi.

 **Shuichi:** (remember this gesture -,-)

 **Kokch:** (-,- and fuck u for giving me hopes) so you actually turned out my own daughter against me -,- you'll. Be. dEAD.

 **Shuichi:** booho what do I care -,-----

 **Kork:** stop that u 2 if u don't even mean it and saying stuff just bc u angry, we have have more important thing to discuss. AKHEM.

 **KORK:** PUT THAT FUCKING GUN

 **SHUICHI:** NO

 **KORK:** GOD FKING DAMMIT

 **KAEDE:** U SRSLY EXPECTED THIS TO WORK-

 **SHUICHI:** SHUT UP YALL AND LET ME SPEAK FOR ONCE. YOU GUYS SAID WHAT YOU WANTED, NOW THIS IS MY TURN TO SPEAK.

 **ANGIE:** OKAY THEN.

 **shuichi:** oh rly-

 

 **SHUICHI:** ANYWAY. FROM THIS DAY, I GONNA TURN THIS SCHOOL INTO A PRISON, TOGETHER WITH MONACA. AND IM GONNA BUILT DEATH CAMPS, HERE IN SCHOOL

(friendly reminder that those were nazi, in other words german death camps, not polish, since some people confuse it)

 **Kork:** are you fucked up or something.

 **Shuichi:** i am not, kork. After all those years of letting ppl what they wanted to me, it's my turn to reach for the control. THIS SCHOOL, is gonna be mine. THOSE STUDENTS, are gonna be mine. WE'LL BE ALSO doing public execution. IN OTHER WORDS:

**SHUICHI: IM GONNA BE HITLER, AND THIS IS GONNA BE MY POLAND.**

**kork:** you're seriously fucked up.

 **Kaito:** well fuck

 

Suddenly

 

**HUGE EXPLOSION ON OUTSIDE!!!!!**

 

 **KAEDE:** SWEET JESUS WHAT AGAIN-

 

**ALL OF THE CAST RUNNED TO THE OUTSIDE TO SEE WHATS GOING ON OUTSIDE--**

**RANTARO: BWAHAHAHAH THERE U GO BITCHCAKES, FIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE**

 

RANTARO AND HIS BAND STOOD THERE RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE EXPLOSIONS, WITH GUNS IN THEIR HANDS

 

 **KORK:** OH MY GOD- I TOLD U SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN WITH HIM

 **RANTARO:** U DIDNT WANT TO ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM, NOW U WILL PAY

 **MIU:** FOR FUCKS- U WERE THE ONE WHO WASNT TALKING ABOUT URSELF

 **RANTARO:** THATS EXACTLY WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT

 **KORK:** RANTARO GTFO WITH UR SHITS

 **SHUICHI:** FUCKING YEAH, I ALREADY CLAIMED THIS SCHOOL U LIL BITCHCAKE

 **RANTARO:** _**GAHAHAHAHAHAH** OH PLEASE, SHOOT THOSE IDIOTS GUYS_

 

**AND SO HIS GROUP AND RANTARO TURNED THEIR GUNS TO HIM**

**SHUICHI:** WHY OF COURSE. MONACA, ATTACK

 **MONACA:** AY AY FATHER

 **KOKCH:** OH NO WAIT A GODDAMN SEC-

 **SHUICHI:** AAAAAAAA

 

**AND SO, SHUICHI OPENED FIRE SHOOTING AT RANTARO- BUT GREEN BOY QUICKLY AVOID IT, AND AIMED AT SAIHARA AND-**

**GONTA:** SCREECH

**GONTA TOOK PLACE OF SAIHARA AND GOT SHOOT IN STOMACH**

**KORK:** HOLY-

 **MIU:** WHAT THE

 **ANGIE:** JFC WHAT THE FU, YALL CRAZY!??

**SAIHARA: BITCHCAKE**

**SAIHARA DIDNT HESITATE TO SHOOT RANTARO, HOWEVER RANTARO MOVED AGAIN AND GOT SHOOT ONLY IN THE ARM THAT HOLDED GUN**

 

 **RANTARO:** OW DAMMIT THAT FKING HURTS U KNOW _*DROPS THE GUN*_ YALL, SHOOT NOW

 **One guy from the band:** ...No need Sir, we understand...

 **Second guy from band:** Yes... We will have no trouble showing the proofs to the court... Also we got innocent person involved just now, so we have to stop that.

 **Rantaro:** Oh, alright.

 **Kork:** what is...

 

And then, rantaro, using one arm, he took off his clothes and...

Revealed the police officer suit.

The band did the same- they had all police suits.

 

**Rantaro, the police man:**

**•proud of his job**

**•loves justice**

**•is also secret agent**

**Rantaro:** Mr. Principal Korekiyo Shinguuji, we are unfortunate to say, that your school can't function anymore.

 **Kork:** wh-

 **Rantaro:** We have been getting multiple reports of mental, sexual, and phisical abuse towards students, throwing stuff from the window, and writing with a chair instead of the pen, leaving a student with heart attack and much more.

 **Rantaro:** And so, as a person the most qualified to this task, I have been sended here in other to take a closer look on situation, and to gather a proofs. Everything while disguised as one of your teachers.

 **Kork:** whaat... So we had spy- aNd traitoR? (Also kokichi ur responsible for throwing things outta window -,-)

 **Rantaro:** Mr. Kork this is only your fault for not keeping an eye for your teachers.

 **KORK:** I WAS, THEY JUST WERENT LISTENING

 **Kokch:** booho, gonta was abusing students a lot more than me in the past , stop looking y'all at me

 **Rantaro:** In any case, or you will choose to close the school yourself, or we will have to go back here, but with much more officers, and weapons this time. So I recommend closing it urself

 **Kaede:** wai tho, this place isn't that crazy

 **Miu:** speak for urself

 **Rantaro:** Well! I said I was supposed to, so now I will head back to our secret base! *kokichi angrily staring in the bg* have fun lol and don't do drugs

 

And so, Rantaro, and other officers, turned around and started walking away.

 **KOKCH:** WAIT A GODDAMN SEC, WHAT ABOUT THAT EXPLOSION, WHAT WAS THAT FOR??

 

rantaro turned around in bootyful style, put his glasses on, wiggled a bit and said

 **Rantaro:** I have no idea 

 

...

Police left and for a moment everyone were quiet.

 

Angie: ...

Tsum: ...

Kaito: ...

Miu: ...

 

Angie: I mean.. We weren't doing that much anyway... And rantaro had kinda right...?

Kaede: ...

Ryoma: ...

Kokch: ...

Shuichi: ...

 

 **Kork:** _*drops to his knees*_ THAT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!

 **KORK:** BECAUSE OF YOUR GODDAMN WAYS AS TEACHERS, AND YOUR INRESPONSIBILITY TO DO GODDAMN PROPER JOB _*cries*_

 **Miu:** he's not wrong

 **Kaede:** shaddup, you were the one of the most pathologic teachers anyway. And now we're without the job.

 

 **Ryoma:** but... The students liked me... That was the only place I was liked _*sobs*_

 **Kaito:** oh I feel u, only those guys didn't mind when I was drinking in the class

 **Angie:** kaito, it's because of teachers like you we are doomed.

 **Gonta:** .----.

 **Kokichi:** gonta u need some psychologist because u r way too sensitive about bugs

 **KOKICHI:** AND ALSO WE NEED TO CALL AN AMBULANCE, U'VE BEEN SHOOTED-

 **gonta:** Gonta doesn't think he's hurted tho, gonta have skin of metal due to his superhuman design. The bullet only tickled a bit.

 **Kiibo:** oh well let's do it anyway owo *calls the ambulance*

 **Ryoma:** oh, didn't notice u there

...

 **Ryoma:** of course.

...

Kaede: so.. We're leaving???

Tsumugi: guess so.

Miu: um shouldn't we care about succi?

Kork: eh leave him by, it doesn't matter anymore since the school closes

 

Shuichi looked at monaca

 **Shuichi:** oh well. She was too scary anyway

 **Kokichi:** then why did u turn her against me?? -,-

 **Shuichi:** well I needed some backup plan for if someone would take gun from he, just in case.

 **Kokichi:** wai u didn't tell monaca to attack me tho-

 **Shuichi:** cough well there wasn't rly need since if I'm not grounded I can always get another gun.

 **Kokichi:** wait how tho??

 **Shuichi:** well _*shuichi whistles*_

 

And then authors appears and throws gun at succi which he catches.

 **Kokichi:** who the hell was that.

 **Shuichi:** I dunno, but they have guns.

 **Kokichi:** u would take gun from each person??

 **Shuichi:** as long as they have guns, ya.

 **Kokichi:** oh- and by the way that letter- uhhhhhhh well you know it was only for distraction, right?

 **Shuichi:** yup.

 **Kokichi:** well uh, if the asian ladybugs weren't stupid enough to lag your brain, uh, in that case i prepared also another thing

 **Shuichi:** which is?

 **Kokichi:** uhhh. The apologies. For your boxers.

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **Kokichi:** and those boxers were attached too.

 **Shuichi:** bdhsjsjshshHDh WHAAaat =-=

 **Shuichi:** wow now that would scare me. Also those were seriously the same?? I thought they were gone forever

 **Kokichi:** well ya, after i tossed them thru the window, (i couldnt let ur hot boxers to just disappear) i felt bad and decided to search for them-

 **Shuichi:** really tho. Where did you get them- also sweet jesus u were carried them around

 **Kokichi** : WE LL-

 **SHUICHI:** nO answer the first thing  >\--<""

 **Kokichi:** well um I u know I like well u know my hobby right

 **Shuichi:** ur hobby being gAy?

 **KOKICHI:** NOOOOOOOOOOOOO  >\--------< I meant the lock picking- u know I'm good at it right

 **Shuichi:** oh ya I remember

 **Kokichi:** so like cough idk like cough answer the rest urself cough like u know already cough right

Shuichi: ...

Kokch: -

 **Shuichi:** I mea n I know that ur gay for me for like 10 years so

 **KOKICHI:** NO IM NOT- wait no sry sometimes it still happens

 **Shuichi** : ...

 **Kokch** : ...

 **Kokch:** sOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....

 **Shuichi:** Soooooooooooooooo

 **Kokch:** don't copy me.

 **Shuichi:** I mean I hope u do realise that I have ptsd disorder, anxiety and paranoia, the thing i need rn is therapist not boyfriend

 **KOKCH:** GAH. CAN I HELP U THO?

 **Shuichi:** whot??

 **Kokch:** can i at least b at ur- omg i cant say that, can we at least meet sometimes?? AND BY SOMETIMES I MEAN ALL THE TIME???

 **Shuichi:** i mean-

 **KOKICHI:** PLS DONT LEAVE ME, AND U NEED SOMEONE WHO NEEDS TO SUPPORT U RIGHT, I CAN DO THE PERFECT JOB-

 **Shuichi** : I mean I was going to suggest u to maintain our relationship outside the school anyway-

 **KoKICHI:** OH .

 **KOKICHI:** O h

 **kOKICHI:** OH OKAY

 **Shuichi:** lol. Let's leave this shitty place then

 **KOKICHI:** OWOWOWOWO OKAY

And so, kokichi took saihara's arm (who didn't protest), and left the school together.

(HAPPY OUMASAI FOREVER YAY)

.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

 

kork and the rest was still there.

 **Kork:** ...

 **Kaede:** happy ppl doesn't count time.

 **Kork:** that have nothing to do with them.

 **KAEDE:** WHOOPS-

 **Kaito:** so like, should we go too?? Playing the teacher was boring anyway- I guess I'll go bother nasa again, Im fraud so I should get job there eventually.

 **Angie:** yikes, Im scared. I guess I'll go build church for atua then, since I will be able to my own rules there. I got some money saved so. Also Tsumugi, wanna come with me?

 **Tsumugi:** Eh, sure thing, I have nothing to do anyway. But I'm not gonna b devoted to atua, I'll only pretend.

 **Angie:** sure. Also Kaede, what u gonna do?

 **Kaede:** I dunno, I guess I'll have to return to making vlogs on yt and monetize them

 **Miu:** I dunno why u stopped recording them?? The most popular ones had like 10 kk.

 **Kaede:** only because I have big boobs.

 **Miu:** oh

 **Kaede:** what u gonna do tho

 **Miu:** I think we all know that I didn't need this work. Not with my inventions.

 **Ryoma:** eh, that's true. I guess I'll go work somewhere with kittens.

 **Miu:** well that's the plan for almost all of us- gonta?

 **Gonta:** gonta will join [#bugprotectionsquad](https://aminoapps.com/c/danganronpa/tag/bugprotectionsquad/).

 **Miu:** ofc.

 **Kaede:** u kork?

 **Kork:** eh, i'll just lament here about my school for a bit. you can go now.

 **Kaito:** sure.

 

And so, the teachers started leaving, and go to hospital with gonta, who

was surprisingly fine (ah those giants and their superpowers). And so, they left kork behind, who was still on his knees.

He was no longer crying, but looking at the school with such sentiment...

 

.

.

.

.

.

.

 

_"Cough"_

 

 

Kork turned around, and he saw...

 

 **Ryoma:** I am still here.

 

 **Kork:** Oh, thought you left with them.

 

 **Ryoma:** Nah.

 

_He said, taking candy cigarette, and putting it to his mouth._

 

_And then, both of them were just there, staring at the school in silence._

 

 _However, kork needed to ask_.

 

 **Kork:** Why did you stay?

 

 **Ryoma:** Well... _*slowly taking out candy cigarette*_ you know why you can't run this school anymore, right?

 

 **Kork:** yeah, because my teachers we're an idiots and couldn't behave properly.

 

 **Ryoma:** Hmm... You can say this, but the real problem, is the government, the rules, and the behavior that is legal in specific country, according to them.

 

 **Kork:** yeah, so?

 

 **Ryoma:** If you were to create your _own_ rules, and decide what is _legal or not, in a specific place_... You wouldn't have problem with "inappropriate" behavior anymore...

 

 **Kork:** ...

 **Kork:**  wait, what are you trying to suggest-

 **RYOMA:**  AM I TRYING TO SUGGEST SOMETHING?

 

**KORK: ARE YOU!?!?!?!?!**

 

**RYOMA: A M I ?**

...

...

...

...

...

 

Kokichi and shuichi were walking through city (kokichi still holding his arm), when...

 **kOKICHI:** CRAP

 **Shuichi:** what is it?

 **KOKICHI:** I REALISED- WE DON'T HAVE JOBS ANYMORE-

 **SHUICHI:** OH-

 **Kokichi:** omg what we gonna do

 **Shuichi:** umm well, my bitch ass uncle have his detective agency, but I'm not joining there.

 **Kokichi:** but-

 **Shuichi:** instead, I'll open my own detective office.

 **Kokichi:** wait really- how will you get money-

 **Shuichi:** it's simple- I got a lot of munz from students when threating them.  

 **Kokichi:** ...

 **Shuichi:** ...

 **Kokichi:** P E R F E C T. WE'LL BUILD OUR KINGDOM AND OUR FUNDAMENTS WILL BE MONEY FROM POOR INNOCENT KIDS!!!

 **kokichi:** my evil heart screams yes.

**Shuichi:**

**Shuichi:** lol

...

...

...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annddd EVEEYTHING WHAT STARTS NEED TO FINISH! AND THATS THE END OF MY STORY ABOUT V3 AS TEACHERS! Kinda sad, kinda happy, kinda suspens, kinda everything. It got a bit long, but im actually happy of the results. Honestly, that was supposed to be only random fics that weren't supposed to have more than two parts but I got super nice comments ( I see u kokichi ouma) so I decided to do more- AND THAT'S WHEN THE STORY WAS STARTING! And about this fic, it was inspired... It wasn't actually inspired, i was doing a bit similiar visual novel to this, and I was curious how Ouma would act like a teacher (most of my parts weren't planned, I was just improvising, it was pretty funny, because the characters could share the reaction i had to my stuff owo and trust me, i wanted to scream at some of my ideas too, trust me). ALSO, the kokichi's personality and well his "style of living" was inspired by my one headcanon with kokch, where he was sad adult living in small apartament, and basically bitching around because DICE don't want play with him anymore. He also would go out with nagito who was homeless, to ask random people on street for money, because they both were poor. Sometimes, teruteru, the poor cook would also join them on. Kokichi curses it because he still have his pride - but pride can't buy him food. Also hajime there is business man who likes taking pictures of him dabbing with sunglasses and garniture, whenever his old poor classmates asks him, how is he living. I called it homeless au. ANYWAY, getting on the track - it was really fun to write this fic, honestly, and I never felt bothered by the thought I need to make another part- this one is so late because the school started, and well, REASONS! Also to assure you the ending wasn't planned out of nowhere- it was actually planned RIGHT AFTER i posted the previous part! Ahhhh oh i remembered that rantaro and the rest of the police mans were supposed to do some dance- oh well!
> 
> Also- do you know what ryoma was trying to suggest? Just saying, the thing ryoma was trying to suggest, was supposed to be plot for sequel one shot, but I like this ending already, and well! Pretty much that's it. I don't wanna talk about it here since it here since there's no way of knowing (even I don't know) if I'll ever write it.
> 
> And so, we get to the thanking part! Thank u reading this series, and if you're actually that means YOU LIKED MY HUMOUR! (I had much fun with this fic lol) I know it sometimes gets too bizzare lel
> 
> Anyhoo, i think that's all from me. My first finished series posted on NET, sweet!
> 
> Also about those boxers- in the end of part 5 or 4 I described at the end the situation when ouma took shuichi's gun, and wanted to give him watergun, but he gave shuichi's boxers, to him, in front of his class. He got super embarrassed and so he quickly grabbed those boxers again and threw thru the window.
> 
> (And about monaca- before rantaro was revealed as an officer she started blubbering into the ground,whatever could this means, and stayed there, glitching)


End file.
